Why Misery is AddictiveFollowing are some of the reasons why you may end up being addicted to misery:
- As a child you may learn that misery equals success and love if your parents had unrealistic expectations and were excessive disciplinarians.
- You may choose to punish yourself or others because of the regret or guilt of poor past situations or decisions that you cannot get over.
- It could be frightening to feel happiness because you may feel it only ends up setting you up for eventual disappointment
- Lack of self-esteem and insecurity could make you believe you do not deserve to be happy.
- Maybe you have an overly realistic, practical view of the world which means you focus on the negatives instead of the positives.
- Struggling with trauma for years and other negative experiences may leave you unconsciously wanting to continue living that way.
- You may have a mental disorder if you feel comfortable being miserable.
- Happiness is so foreign to you that you fear the unknown and being miserable is an easier choice.
Characteristics of an Addiction to MiseryAre you addicted to living in misery? Would you even know? Here are some clues. If you have an addiction to misery you:
- No longer look after yourself including not getting enough exercise or sleep, and do not eat a healthy diet.
- Are not happy when everything seems to be going well in your life. You may expect it al to crash down around you at any minute.
- Look for excuses to be miserable if life goes too well
- Find it difficult to set goals and focus on achieving them or, if you do achieve them, you do not enjoy the feeling of success.
- Rather than taking responsibility for your choices and decisions, you prefer to play the victim and blame everyone else for what goes wrong in your life.
- Feel that you cannot control your emotions or unempowered to make changes.
- Succumb to using legal or illegal substances, food or sex or other compulsive behaviours to help you cope.
- Compete with friends, family and work colleagues about who has it the toughest.
- Have relationships that are unfulfilling, toxic or full of drama.
- Struggle to pick yourself up when things get tough.