Anger is a normal, instinctive response to feeling threatened in some way. So feeling anger at times is alright as it can help you survive. It is how, why and when you express anger that can cause problems. And you may need help to manage it.
Getting so angry you become abusive or violent is never acceptable. But suppressing anger will not help either. Controlling angry outbursts can lead to other physical and mental problems. A 2016 study found that anger is the unrecognised emotion in emotional disorders. So instead of suppressing it or taking it out on the nearest person or object, learn to control your anger. Learn how to manage it. Acknowledge how you feel to avoid taking your anger out on someone else.
So how do you know if you have anger management issues? You know you have an anger problem when you cannot control it and you end up saying or doing things you later regret. Are you asking yourself, how do I know if I need help with anger issues?
Do I need help with anger issues?
You may need help managing anger issues if you:
· Are quick to anger.
· Often become angry.
· Become verbally or physically abusive.
· Regret what you say and do in the heat of the moment.
· Cannot control feelings of anger.
· Are hurting the people you love.
Symptoms of anger issues
When you are angry it can cause emotional and physical symptoms. It is normal to experience these symptoms sometimes. But if you have anger issues then you can experience them more often and more severely.
Physical symptoms of anger
Getting angry can affect your brain, muscles and heart. Many studies found that anger results in an increase of testosterone which relates to aggression. Other physical symptoms include an increased heart rate and blood pressure, muscular tension and a tingling sensation throughout your body.
Emotional symptoms of anger
When you get angry, there are emotional symptoms before, during and after an episode. These can include feeling:
· stressed out
· uncontrollable rage
Causes of angry outbursts
There are many things that can trigger an angry outburst. These can include your job, family and money troubles. But anger may be a symptom of another mental health disorder such as depression, obsessive compulsive disorder, bipolar disorder, anxiety and alcohol or drug abuse.
All this should give you insight into recognising anger issues. But the question is what are you going to do about it?
Strategies for dealing with anger
The highly trained and experienced Brain Wellness Spa facilitators may be able to assist with your anger issues. While you do not need to talk about what is going on with you, it can help you to start to take back control. A huge 97.4% of clients with anger issues notice changes after their first Spa session. Apart from receiving the benefit of the Brain Wellness Spa alternative technique, your facilitator will talk to you about strategies for dealing with anger.
Remain calm and think before speaking
Remaining calm when you start to feel angry may be easier said than done. So try taking some deep breaths to help you stay calm. And think before speaking to put a stop to those negative angry thoughts.
When your anger starts to rise, stop for a moment and breathe deeply several times from your diaphragm. Even tell yourself to relax or there is no need to get angry as you breathe. Keep this up until you feel better. This will give you time to process your thoughts so you do not react in a negative manner.
Express your anger in an appropriate way
You may need to learn how to control anger outbursts as they are counter productive and hurt the people around you. While suppressing anger is not good for your health, it is important to express it in an appropriate way.
Getting angry is stressful and can damage your health. Instead learn to be assertive. This means you strike a balance between being passive and aggressive in the way you express your feelings and needs. Being assertive requires you to be straightforward while taking others’ feelings and rights into account. Express your feelings calmly without becoming defensive or getting upset. So instead of losing your temper, be assertive to get your point across. Brain Wellness Spa facilitators can talk to you about assertiveness as part of an anger management plan.
Do something physical
It is well known that exercise is a good way to reduce stress and clear your head. And as anger causes a rush of energy there is no better way to use it than to burn it off getting physical. Next time you feel yourself becoming angry, go for a walk or a run, work out at the gym or even spend time doing something physical around the house.
Remember, doing something physical is a good way to destress. Committing to regular exercise can help improve your frustration levels. After working out or going for a walk, you may find you have a clearer perspective about what made you angry.
Talk to someone you trust
Talk to someone you trust who has a calming effect on you. It is important to talk through how you feel to get an outside perspective. But remember not to turn it into a venting session. Complaining about how hard your life is or how much you dislike someone can backfire. Remember that venting often only adds fuel to the fire rather than making you feel better.
When talking out your feelings, work on developing a solution or make light of the situation so your anger reduces. It is not very fair to use someone all the time as your negative sounding board. Instead it may even be better to talk about something unrelated to what is making you angry.
Explore how you feel
It can help to explore how you feel. Think about the emotions underlying the anger you feel. Often anger can be a cover up for other emotions such as embarrassment and disappointment. For example, someone may give you feedback that you do not like and your first instinct may be to lash out in anger. And this could be to cover feelings of embarrassment. You may convince yourself the person criticising you has no right to talk to you that way to justify getting angry. It is important to acknowledge any underlying emotions, such as fear or disappointment, so you can get to the cause of the problem. Only then can you determine the best action to take.
When someone cancels the plans you have with each other you will probably feel disappointed. So instead of getting angry with them, let them know how you truly feel. Being honest about your feelings helps you to resolve your issues. Reacting angrily all the time will only serve to push people away.
When your anger is out of control or has a negative effect on friends and family, it can be time to seek help from a mental health professional. They can help you get to the root cause of anger issues and determine whether you need treatment. They will also help you come up with an anger management plan that can include:
· Medications for underlying mental health conditions.
· Interacting with a support group.
· Anger management classes online, in person or over the phone.
· Alternative therapies such as the Brain Wellness Spa technique.
· Behavioural therapy.
Anger can be hard to beat alone. So do not be afraid to reach out for support.
When your anger affects your mental and physical health, your life can feel as if it is spiralling out of control. Is losing your temper a habit you find hard to break? You may fly off the handle for almost any reason but then regret your actions afterwards. Or you may be highly stressed and anxious and not be seeing things clearly or not know how to manage your anger.
Having trouble controlling angry outbursts can impact your life in a negative way. It can hurt your relationships with friends, family and colleagues. It can even damage your career. You cannot continue to live with anger issues if you want your life to improve. Your anger will only continue to take a toll on you physically and mentally.
It is time to take steps to do something about it — to take back control. Seek help. You do not have to do it alone. The sooner you get help, the sooner you can turn the anger around and start feeling happier and positive about life.
If you are struggling, reach out to our professionals. When you are not coping, contact us. We can talk to you about getting your life back on track. But if you reach a crisis point, call us immediately. We are here to support you.
Give the Brain Wellness Spa a try by booking a free 25-minute telehealth consultation. Or discover a seamless way to rejuvenate your emotional and mental health by becoming a member. It will give you access to more than 75 audio programs that can help your child and you to live inspired and improve mental wellbeing.
We can work with you over the phone, via Skype or in our Spas. Book in today for my Emotional Empowerment Program. I have an introductory offer for just $99 so you may start taking back control of your life. We aim to help you cope with any mental health challenges. Our facilitators may alleviate the effects of these so you start to take control and enjoy life again.